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Wired.com has an article on the state of affairs of online gambling in the United States. As you may know, the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act (UIGEA) was passed back in September of 2006, making it illegal for Americans to gamble online. Most online poker players thought this sucked, and apparently still do. Also, not surprisingly, they’re getting past the blockade with the same old tricks, such as foreign pre-paid debit cards and Canadian addresses. If it weren’t so sickenly disturbing that we’re going through Prohibition all over again, it might even be funny.

In the interesting side note department, it seems the player interviewed in the Wired article, identified only as ‘Boy Wonder,’ graduated with me from Haverford in 2005.

The novice used to pay the rent for Boy Wonder, who started playing poker full-time after graduating from Haverford College in 2005. He earned around $1,000 a week playing in $1/2 and $2/4 limit games, which specify the amount a player can bet during rounds of play. But now the game is more trouble to him than it’s worth. “It’s unstable,” he says.

Soooo, who could it be? I have theories…

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As part of its new Viagra advertising campaign, Pfizer has created an ad series running on Canadian television in which the characters speak in a completely made-up language. Examples include words like ’spanglecheff’ and ‘minky noni noni.’ Obviously, this campaign attempts to skirt around viewers who have issues with the sex-related medication, especially in Canada, where drug companies are apparently prohibited from mentioning both the name of a product and the condition it is intended to treat in the same commercial.

If it’s successful, it will say a whole lot about Viagra’s name recognition, since the product is the only ‘real’ word in any of the commercials. Also, it’s a pretty clever way to use imagination to market a product to a particular age group, namely adults who provide within their own heads the translation of the obviously sexual conversation conducted in the made-up language. Plus, any kids who see or hear the commercial will have no idea what’s going on, unless they’re already aware of Viagra and what it does. If they don’t, of course, the very word will sound just like the rest of the nonsense surrounding it.

Of course, what’s really happening here is that the first guy is telling the second “There will be no deal, young Jedi.”

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Chevy, Ford, and Dodge: You are here.

2007 will mark the entry of the Toyota Motor Corp.’s Toyota Racing Division into the NASCAR Nextel Cup Series. Obviously, some of the less enlightened enthusiasts of NASCAR are taking offense to the introduction of a ‘Japanese’ or ‘foreign’ car company into an ‘All-American’ sport. Their reasoning is simple: Chevy, Ford, and Dodge are American companies, based in good ole’ Dee-troit, and provide jobs to good ole’ hard-working Americans (like the ones who watch NASCAR). Let in the foreigners, they say, and all of that apple-pie feeling will disappear, along with a bunch more jobs for hard-working Americans who will be laid off after the big three are forced to shut their doors for good. Now, it’s one thing to attack these folks for their inherently racist beliefs, or to call them ignorant and backwards because they’re unwilling to accept the ‘global marketplace’ for what it is, but that’s too vague, too open to debate. Here’s something that isn’t.

Of all the race cars on the track next year, only Toyota’s will be made in America.

What? Oh, yes. See, all of those good ole’ American manufacturers have taken to outsourcing jobs away from those well-deserving NASCAR fans in the Midwest, and sending them to Canada and Mexico, thanks to NAFTA. That leaves only Toyata, whose management, realizing that they must constantly fight ignorant, backward, and racist beliefs in order to build their brand name here in the U.S.A., has made sure throughout the company’s expansion into the U.S. to manufacture and assemble as much and as many of their cars here as possible. So, NASCAR fans, when the ‘foreigners’ come squealing onto the track in their shiny new Camrys, just remember that they’re driving the only cars that helped hard-working Americans put food on the table.

And one more thing. Mexico, I see…but why Canada?
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