Southwest Airlines: A symbol of freedom from red tape, unnecessary fees, and overpriced snack food

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Southwest: You are now free from airline stupidity
Southwest jet

In the cut-throat world of commercial airline travel, the concept of ‘reward miles’ has come to be used as a powerful tool for keeping frequent travelers coming back to the same airline, time and time again. More recently, as discount airlines entered the fray, we saw the beginnnings of a new variant on the classic ‘miles’ theme: rewards points. Airlines such as AirTran and Southwest started giving away coupons or points based on each one-way flight a customer took, regardless of the length of the flight or how many stopovers it entailed. Once you accumlate a set number of points through one of these programs, you’re entitled to a free roundtrip flight, usually anywhere in the continental U.S.
Southwest is one of the discount airlines offering such a program. With Southwest’s Rapid Rewards, you earn one point for each one-way flight (two for a roundtrip, for the math-impaired). After you’ve accumulated 16 points (that’s 8 round trips), you earn a certificate good for roundtrip air travel anywhere in the U.S.
Now, up ’til now, it sounds like a pretty generic program. And that’s what I figured it would be when I signed up and started collecting points. But recently, I hit the magical 16-point mark, and decided to cash in my certificate for a flight from Manchester to Philly and back. I decided I wanted to go about 3 weeks in the future, and first off, I checked to see what the flight would cost if I paid cash for it–$380. In other words, only the expensive seats were left (Southwest uses a system with about 5 price tiers–this flight normally costs between $85 and $450 RT). Nevertheless, I had no problem booking rewards travel through the website, without ever having to pick up the phone or wrestle with complicated blackout dates.
I admit I was pretty impressed with how smoothly the booking went, but it’s what happened next that I couldn’t believe. I was on vacation in Orlando, FL, and decided I’d like to leave a little early. I called up Southwest on a Tuesday night, explained that I’d already booked a trip from Manchester-Philly, but that I’d like to change it to a one-way from Orlando back to Manchester. When the customer service rep. on the other end asked me when I wanted to fly, and I said ‘tomorrow,’ I figured she’d immediately start laughing at me, or at least announce there’d be a huge fee for changing my reservation. Instead, she put me on a flight the next evening, and told me there was no charge for the change. I’ll repeat that.

Southwest doesn’t charge a fee to change a Rapid Rewards reservation, even at the last minute.

The story gets better. The next morning it turned out I didn’t need the flight back, so I sheepishly called Southwest back and told them I needed to cancel the one-way from Orlando to Manchester, and I’d like to re-book the original flight to Philly. Without even a hesitation, the agent put me back on the same flights I had been on just two days before, and politely wished me a good day. Once again, no fee, no admonition from the person on the other end of the phone, and no whining about blackout dates.

The American Airlines Snack Box, or, What the Heck is a Lorna Doone?
Ughhhh

In this day and age, it seems like most airlines believe that cutting their prices and services will help them attract customers while keeping them in the black. On the flight I ended up taking back from Florida, on American Airlines, I was told that I needed to pay $4 for a snack-pack consisting of crackers and peanuts.

Southwest Peanuts: Dry and boring like the Snack Pack, but priced to move
Peanuts

It wasn’t so much that I was being asked to pay for food (I understand that not everyone eats the free food, so it’s a huge waste for the airline, so several have begun offering items such as Bennigan’s sandwiches on an a la carte menu), but rather that my only option was to buy the same junk I used to get for free.
When I expressed surprise to the flight attendant, she said, “How long has it been since you’ve flown…oh wait, you were on Southwest, right?”

Damn straight.

American Airlines, Southwest, airline, peanuts, Rapid Rewards, Snack Pack, reservation, reward miles, miles, Manchester, airport, Philadelphia, Philly, change reservation, fees, fee, Southwest website, Southwest airlines


Douchebag of the Day: Faye Moore

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Alright, let me start this by saying I don’t know Faye Moore, nor anything about her, except that she currently occupies the position of General Manager of SEPTA (click the link, it tells you everything you’ll need to know), the SouthEastern Pennsylvania Transit Authority. SEPTA, or as its more affectionately called by the cognoscenti, the SEPTIC system, is the worst public transit system on the face of the Earth. This is claiming a lot, I know, but I’ve been on a few subway systems, and none of them even come close to sucking as incredibly much as does SEPTA.
“How much does SEPTA suck?” I hear you people from the greater New York-New England area say.
Well, my friends, consider the following announcement, overheard at a downtown station: “The R7 to Trenton (NJ) is currently not running due to unplanned repairs on the track. Travelers to Trenton should seek an alternate means of transportation.” I don’t need to tell Bostonians that the slogan we grew up hearing was “T. The alternate route.” So, pray tell…if I’m on the alternate route, and it’s not running, what the FUCK am I supposed to do? Also note, Trenton, New Jersey is a considerable distance from Philadelphia, and it was rush hour. Thankfully, I was heading west, both because it would have been unfortunate to be stuck without transport, and also because it would suck to have to go to Jersey.
I would blame this incident on freak coincidence, were it not for SEPTA’s recent proposed plan to shut down weekend service on several train lines. That’s right, these douchebags were willing to let the hardworking people of Philadelphia unlucky enough to be working weekends walk, because of ‘budget problems.’ The city of Buenos Aires, Argentina, is the capital of a country whose currency is worth less than dogshit, yet its subway system miraculously manages to stay open a whopping 7 days a week.
Anyway, Faye Moore, you’re the unlucky face of the miserable institution known as SEPTA, so you’re a douchebag.